The Twilight Saga: New Moon Review

 

On her 18th birthday Isabella Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) is on top of the moon when Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) the vampire she falls in love with and his family throw her a birthday party. While unwrapping a gift, she gets a paper cut, which causes Edward’s adopted brother, Jasper (Jackson Rathbone), to be overwhelmed by the smell of her blood and attempt to kill Bella. To protect her, Edward decides to end their relationship, and the Cullens move away from Forks. This leaves Bella heart-broken and depressed.

 

 

Miley Cyrus: Twitter should be banned

A highlight of her invective was, perhaps: “Because people, like, honestly, like, I mean people wanna know why, like, you’re, like, unhealthy, and, like, you need, like, get out and do stuff and, like, be in the world instead of being like this (pretends to be hunched over a keyboard) all the time. And, like, all I did was, like, lay in bed all the time.”

I know there will be some who might fear that Miley has removed herself from Twitter because the 140 character limit did not allow her full expression of her likes and thoughts.

However, I am confident that this deeply introspective performer is merely trying to warn her fellow teens of the dangers of immersing yourself far too much in, well, yourself.

As she further cautioned: “I”m not really a big fan of the Internet any more. I don’t really get online.”

Should you or your children be concerned that Miley might disappear entirely from the Internet, please rush to purchase some of Miley’s fine recordings, which are available at iTunes.

David Letterman becomes butt of rivals’ jokes

After David Letterman admitted to having sex with women employees on his show, and being targeted in an alleged extortion plot, America’s other leading chat show hosts have been queuing up to poke fun at him.

Letterman’s long time rival Jay Leno led the charge, unable to resist introducing his own show by telling the audience: “If you came here tonight for sex with a talk show host, you’ve got the wrong studio.”

Leno went on: “The guy that was trying to blackmail Letterman was a producer for the show ‘48 Hours.’ It could have been worse – at least he wasn’t producer of ‘To Catch a Predator’.”

NBC’s “Late Night” host Jimmy Fallon followed up with: “There’s a new book out called ‘Why Women Have Sex’ that says there are 237 reasons why women have sex. And folks, Letterman knows the top 10.”

On “Saturday Night Live” anchor Seth Meyers said the alleged blackmailer was threatening to reveal embarrassing details of Letterman’s personal life.

Meyers said: “After sex, he would always say, ‘Stay tuned for Craig Ferguson’.” Ferguson’s show follows Letterman’s.

However, Conan O’Brien who presents NBC’s “Tonight Show” and is battling with Letterman in the ratings, dodged the issue and decided not to revel in Letterman’s misfortune.

One of his guests, the comedian Drew Carey, said: “I would hate to be on opposite Letterman tonight with all that sex stuff going on. That’s got to be tough.”

But O’Brien replied “No comment” and moved on.

Other big names on US talk shows have yet to wade in with gags at Letterman’s expense. Still to be heard from are Jon Stewart on “The Daily Show” and Stephen Colbert on “The Colbert Report” both of which will air on Monday night.